


As It Should Be

by parttimefemmefatale (writingramblr)



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, F/M, Fluff, Kissing, Post-Episode: s01e11 Boom Town, Shippy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-13
Updated: 2015-02-13
Packaged: 2018-03-12 06:23:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3346832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writingramblr/pseuds/parttimefemmefatale
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Boom Town, Rose and Jack decide to take a break, even though it's not at all what Rose wants, she knows she needs time to figure out her feelings for the Doctor, considering how low the odds are that he feels remotely the same.<br/>Little does she know that her feelings are anything but reciprocated...</p>
            </blockquote>





	As It Should Be

**Author's Note:**

> Bit of fluff just in time for valentines day, although this was originally written and posted on tumblr back in January....  
> Hope ya'll enjoy.

The fact that Cardiff was nearly ripped in two, and the world split on its edge, had no bearing on Rose Tyler’s wish for some time off from traveling.

She felt ripped in two herself when she finally brought it up to the Doctor, putting a hand atop his, before he started the De-materialization sequence.

“But Rose…”

“Please Doctor. I just need some time to think.”

Jack stepped up immediately, sliding his hand into hers, and Rose saw the shift in the Doctor’s blue eyes. He may have thought she couldn’t read him, didn’t know him well enough, but he was wrong.

That small gesture of support was like a knife to his back.

“I’ll stick around and keep an eye on her. I can call you right? So can she. Whenever she’s ready, we’ll let you know.”

“We is it? That was fast.”

The Doctor spun around and away, and called out,

“You two enjoy your vacation, but don’t expect me to come running when you call.”

Jack was already halfway out the front doors, having no more on him than the clothes he’d arrived with and his vortex manipulator.

Rose hung back and lingered, though her feet twitched and she knew she shouldn’t do anything she might regret.

The Doctor just looked so hurt.

He was covering it up, blustering about, and acting as if it was just another stop on the way.

They’d been to Kyoto and freezing Russia in the winter, but Rose had known something was wrong since they’d first rescued Jack.

The Doctor had been subtly distancing himself, pushing her towards Jack. So why the rotten attitude? It was practically what he wanted.

“Doctor?”

Her voice was barely a hushed whisper, and over the humming of the TARDIS, could have easily been mistaken for the breeze that drifted by as Jack slipped out the front doors.

“What are you still doing here? You’re wasting time.”

The Doctor wasn’t looking at her, wasn’t going to meet her eye it seemed, and Rose remained frozen where she stood.

“I couldn’t just walk out without saying goodbye, and thank you. For everything that I’ve seen.”

“Clearly if your boyfriend could, you can. Don’t thank me just yet. Go experience some real life again.”  


Rose felt her stomach clench.

“You’re just determined to do this aren’t you? End badly?”

“I don’t like goodbyes, or endings. So go on. Have a fantastic life.”

Not a single drop of emotion had come through in his voice as he’d spoken to her, and she felt every word like a cold dagger.

“Okay. You too. Don’t have too much fun while we’re gone.”

She managed a smile, but it wasn’t very real. More like an echo.

She didn’t know it, but the Doctor watched every step as she went, and she didn’t look back.

***

He threw the lever forward, and the TARDIS dove into the vortex like an Olympic swimmer returning to water after a breather.

“Well what was I supposed to do? Beg her to stay? She wouldn’t have.”

The Doctor understood how pointless arguing with his ship was, yet he still did it often.

Now was an important time to do so.

She couldn’t give him advice, but she could show him how wrong he was, about himself, about Rose and Jack, and everything he didn’t think he could have.

He’d barely had time to finish complaining when the ship came to a stop, and he found himself on an outlying planet of the Milky Way.

So close, and yet so far.

“What do you need me to get here?”

No reply.

The Doctor muttered and mumbled and stomped towards the doors, sonic in one hand, and the other shoved into his pocket lest he accidentally break the device between them.

***

To the Doctor, five years was a second. A twin beat of his hearts.

For Rose and Jack, and Mickey, whom they both saw rather frequently, it was an eternity.

Every time Rose looked at her phone, scrolled through the contacts, and let her thumb linger over the TARDIS icon, she stopped herself.

She remembered the words, and the look of the Doctor, and stopped.

Instead, she’d decided to take the time to focus on herself. She didn’t really want to do school for the time off from traveling, but it had seemed like the best idea. Until Jack reminded her how easily he could go back and place a sizeable investment for them both to enjoy while they let the Doctor enjoy his time off.

That’s what Jack called it.

Their little joke.

They were forcing the Doctor to take a vacation, but he didn’t know it. luckily, Jack told her he’d given his ship a few suggestions about what he could do while they were gone, and Rose giggled at the idea of the physic ship actually taking them.

If she didn’t laugh, she knew she would have cried at the thought.

The mere whisper of a suggestion that the Doctor was even having a bit of fun without them, without her, hurt a bit more than she liked.

She knew it was probably a bit selfish, but she didn’t care.

In the meantime, Jack’s little trip to the past and back had paid off. She hadn’t asked precisely what historical event he’d chosen to take the monetary advantage on, but she wasn’t about to question the six figures in her bank account.

Instead of doing what she originally thought she wanted, traveling her own little world on her own, she took the money and went in search of the perfect apartment.

Jack had laughed at her at first, before realizing what she wanted to do.

An architectural twin of the TARDIS, she’d told him.

Tongue twister jokes aside, he admitted it was a clever plan. It would be a beautiful second home.

It only took about a year to design and plan, and the second it was complete, Rose invited Jack and Mickey over.

They spent several minutes walking around silently appreciating the nuances and the similarities.

Mickey was the first to point out the obvious.

“It’s so quiet.”

Except for the soft rush of water in the manmade pond in the center, filled with colorful fish and bright green plants, there was no sound.

“Oh I’m sorry, I’ll go put some music on. Silly me, what a rubbish host I am.”

Rose stepped away from the bottle of wine she’d been about to open and pour, and moved towards the living room, a gently lit room with an arch of soft honey brown wood just to the left of the chairs that were quiet identical to the console room jumpseat, but closer to the ground.

“No. Rose. He means there’s no life to it.”

Jack’s voice stopped Rose in her tracks.

“No life?”

Jack’s blue eyes looked downcast,

“I can’t hear the engine humming, so it doesn’t really feel like home at all. How can you stand this silence?”

Rose collapsed into a nearby chair, and shook her head.

“I don’t know. I can’t believe I didn’t notice. I guess it’s just been so long…”

She trailed off, and the guilt suddenly came back in force.

She’d been able to ignore it for the last few months, working so diligently on the place, and she had also pretended everything was finally working for her, because she’d simply never had the motivation or the means.

But it had never been anything more than a project to distract her from the inevitable.

The Doctor wasn’t going to come unless he was called, and she couldn’t find the courage to call him and admit how much she needed him.

She dissolved into tears, and she faintly heard Jack telling Mickey to go on, and he’d take care of her.

Moments later he was pulling her into a hug, and she just remained motionless in his arms, letting only the occasional sob leave her mouth.

***

A twin heartbeat.

That was all it seemed to the Doctor, but before he knew it, he’d finished up on the planet his ship had brought him too, and brought with him a decent beard and longer shaggy hair.

Something about the air affecting his DNA they’d told him, considering how close to human he was, which wasn’t really much, it shouldn’t have worked.

But the TARDIS whispered to him that he’d let it happen, he’d ignored the urge to simply waste time shaving and maintaining the perfectly smooth face, because he had no one left to worry about kissing at any moment.

“Oi!”

“ _It’s True.”_

“Even if it was, at one point, it doesn’t matter.”

A somber hum was the only reply he received.

“How long was I there?”

Five years blinked at him from the screen, and he swallowed.

2010 in earth time now.

He supposed it wouldn’t hurt to take a peek in on his two former companions.

All that time and not a peep. Not a single call, nor text, as the phone was perfectly capable of as well.

A dark and dangerous thought made shivers shoot down his spine.

What if something had happened to either of them?

Rose…

The image of her pale and near death in a hospital somewhere came to mind, before he shook himself, and willed it away.

Then an entirely different white clad image came to mind.

Bells sung a haunting melody in his ears, as Rose smiled up at someone who was most definitely not him from underneath a lace veil, and he suddenly knew he needed to get back to earth before the curiosity killed him.

The TARDIS, meddlingly wonderful ship she was, had already set a course for the golden haired human’s planet, and when the engine fell back to a quiet hum, the Doctor released the death grip he’d been maintaining on the console, completely unconsciously.

“Thank you.”

He didn’t even have to look to see where she’d brought him.

Somewhere on the outskirts of London.

It was not Jack’s home.

It had to be hers.

The streets were surprisingly clean and the air even smelled relatively sweet, and he knew that Rose had not picked her place of residence by accident.

There was no sign of life at the moment, and he wondered why.

He scanned the area with his sonic, and wrinkled his nose in disgust.

It was Sunday.

He hated Sundays.

Nothing ever happened.

It was almost as if the entire universe had declared Sundays off limits.

Maybe even monsters liked a lie in.

A clicking of heels brought his attention back to the present moment, and he squinted at a figure in the distance, growing closer every moment.

There was no mistake. It was Rose.

She looked so different.

Five years had turned a blossoming young woman into a fully fledged goddess.

Not that anything but his subconscious would ever admit that.

Her blonde hair was slightly darker, and back from her face in perfect curls. She wore less makeup, but in a way, he’d known she’d never needed it.

She wore an elegant silver dress, underneath a large black wool jacket.

He frowned as he recognized the style.

Very much like a certain Captains.

The clicking was coming from her high heeled boots, and he fought the urge to smile. He never thought he’d see the day when Rose Tyler wore impractical running shoes.

But they drew his eyes to her legs, which were incredible.

He’d never really taken much time to look at them, considering she’d always had them covered up. But he’d had a niggling feeling in the back of his mind.

“Hello? Can I help you?”

She’d reached him, and now he felt horribly out of place next to her refined splendor.

What a change.

“No, I’m just sightseeing.”

***

Rose had enjoyed a peaceful morning, brunch with her mum and Jack and Mickey, who surprisingly all got along well, despite the elephant in the room that they all shared.

Five years to the day, that was how long the Doctor had been gone, and Rose and Jack were prepared to wait another week before calling.

Jack had been much kinder, giving the Doctor millions of excuses to why he was so late, and Rose was prepared to listen to them, but not that day.

She’d called him, or at least tried to so many times. Once a month at least, she’d very nearly pressed the button but always held back and then had simply resorted to throwing the phone against the nearest wall.

Eventually it wouldn’t even turn on anymore, and she’d sat and looked at it for a few days before throwing it away.

That had been six months back.

She arrived back to her apartment, and was about to fumble for the keys, cursing her new purse, which although had been a thoughtful present from Jack, was almost certainly a miniature black hole which devoured everything she needed the moment before she needed it.

A tall man with a scruffy beard and finger length hair was lingering by the building, and Rose frowned. She wasn’t terribly worried for herself, but she knew how harshly the authorities treated bums.

She called out to him, and he gave a glib reply.

Her heartbeat thundered in her ears.

That voice…

It was so familiar.

She stepped closer, ignoring the screaming voice of reason inside her head, and spotted bright clear blue eyes beneath the brown fringe.

“Doctor?”

His face split into a grin, and he shrugged,

“What gave me away?”

Rose choked on a laugh, and glanced behind him, finding with her eyes the one place that always sang to her of home and safety and acceptance.

The TARDIS sat glowing softly in the cloudy afternoon light, and she finally did smile, though her eyes stung with tears.

“Is that your idea of a disguise?”

The Doctor appeared to think for a moment, before replying,

“I’m trying to look my age. Beards help, don’t they?”

Rose bit her lip, and nodded.

“I guess so.”

“How’ve you been?”

His voice was so rough, she was prepared to ask if he’d started up smoking as well, when she noticed his blue eyes were sparkling, and it wasn’t from joy.

“Doctor…I’ve missed you so much, but I’ve kept so busy…trying to pretend I didn’t. Jack’s been the same, but not nearly as bad as me. I broke the phone too.”

Before she knew it, the Doctor was surging forward and she was falling into his arms, breathing in the smell of old worn leather and something faint and spicy.

His hand came up to cup the back of her head and his fingers stroked through her hair, messing the perfect style.

She didn’t care.

He may have not noticed how she’d gotten a bit older, but he managed to make her forget even a second had passed since she’d seen him.

“Oh Rose…I’m sorry I was so stubborn.”

She sniffled and tried to laugh again,

“You stubborn? I’m the one who couldn’t make a single phone call for five years.”

The Doctor shuddered a deep breath beneath her,

“Has it really been that long?”

Rose nodded, and pulled away,

“Every day I hoped to wake up to the sound of the engines, and find this had all been a horribly realistic nightmare.”

The Doctor pulled away, and only let his hand linger on her cheek a moment before looking up and around at her apartment building.

“So this is where you live now?”

Rose swallowed her disappointment at how fast he was distracted, and nodded again.

“I picked it out specially, and designed most of it myself. Would you like to see?”

The Doctor beamed,

“Of course. You also need to pack.”

To her astonishment, he reached out for her hand, and squeezed it gently, before tugging on it, walking her inside her own building.

“Okay.”

***

The Doctor wasn’t too keen on spending a lot of time anywhere near Jackie Tyler might be, but for Rose, he’d make an exception.

He’d vaguely heard that she’d said the phone had been damaged, and the small amount of satisfaction it brought wasn’t nearly as relieving as seeing her left hand was bare.

Of course seeing her at all was incredible. He knew if he’d not seen her for over a day, he would have needed to start checking hospitals, or something equally as dramatic.

The utter sense of peace he’d felt when she’d fit perfectly into his arms again was dizzying.

He was a time lord. The last of his kind.

He didn’t need a human to make him feel alive.

But she did it so well.

He’d taken her hand, and she’d led him up the stairs into her apartment, babbling all the while about what she’d been doing.

Her apartment had been so creatively designed when Jack posted photos to his account of facebooks or something, it had gone viral.

She explained how it had brought in a rush of design requests from total strangers, people willing to simply pay her to re-imagine their apartments, and she’d accepted.

“I never thought I’d see myself doing anything more than the typical, school, then uni, then some dreary desk job, but I did.”

“Rose, I’m sure you have a well of undiscovered talents.”

She laughed, and the sound made his hearts clench. He realized then and there how much he’d missed her smile, and her hand in his.

“Here we are.”

She pulled away from him, only to guide him inside, before stepping around him to close the door, and his jaw dropped.

The apartment was incredible, and it was clearly designed with the TARDIS’s warm interior and atmosphere in mind.

The floor was soft sand colored wood, and the wooden arches and staircase were perfect replicas of the coral struts, but warmer, so much warmer.

A gently whispering pond trailed through the apartment, seeming to split it almost in two, while bright red fish danced around beneath the surface, his eyes next caught on the second story, and the spiraling light fixtures that illuminated it.

“That’s my room upstairs.”

Rose spoke up, and she almost startled him.

“It’s fantastic. You made all of this? From memory?”

Rose shrugged,

“It was easy. I don’t think I could forget it if I tried.”

The Doctor ran a hand over one of the imitation struts, and felt slight disappointment when there was no answering hum.

“Sorry. I haven’t figured out how to copy the engine’s yet.”

The Doctor chuckled.

“I don’t think that’s something you can have without an actual ship.”

Rose shrugged,

“Maybe…so you like it?”

“Of course. I think if she could see it, she’d be flattered.”

He smiled down at her, and saw the praise reflected back at him in her eyes.

“Thank you.”

“So…do you want to call the captain? Or should I look him up?”

The Doctor held up his sonic, and Rose eyed it for a moment, before shaking her head.

“Don’t worry, I’ll get him. You just, ah, stay here.”

The Doctor lifted a brow at her, but did as she asked.

She climbed the spiral staircase remarkably fast considering her foot attire, and crossed the bridge over to her bedroom.

There were no doors, so he could hear her rummaging around, though he could see nothing.

Two thuds sounded almost one right after the other, and he had a sneaking suspicion she’d shed her boots.

The lingering thought was confirmed when he saw her moving back towards the stairs, and her almost silent footsteps padded gently on the surface.

She reached ground level and he was stunned yet again.

She’d changed into a simple pink hoodie over a white tank top, and jeans with her favorite sneakers. The ones she’d always worn.

Her hair was down and loose, and the curls had already fallen into waves over her shoulders.

She beamed up at him and looked almost the years younger.

“Ready?”

Only then did he notice the small bag she held in her free hand, while the aforementioned broken phone was clutched in the other.

“Absolutely.”

Rose held out the phone, and he took it at once, filing it away into one of his large pockets.

“I texted Jack from my cellphone, he’ll be meeting us out front.”

“So then…”

The Doctor never spoke without good reason, but that had been a delaying tactic. A horribly obvious one.

Rose was still looking at him expectantly, and he hesitated.

What would it hurt?

“I’m sorry.”

Rose frowned, and her dark brows met perfectly over her nose,

“What?”

“I mean it. I know I hurt you. I practically made you leave. I’m sorry.”

“Doctor…”

The bag fell from her hand with a thump, and she put her arms around him again.

Two hugs in one day?

That was a new record.

It would be so easy to just…pull back slightly, and do it.

“Do you think Jack will make fun of me?”

Rose moved back, and he resisted the urge to simply stare at her perfect pink lips.

“For this?”

She reached up and stroked a hand over his brow, fingers weaving into the longer hair, and then down to touch his beard.

“Maybe…but I bet you could go shave it off on the TARDIS before he gets here.”

The Doctor never felt nervous. But in that instant he did.

“Would you help me?”

Rose’s brown eyes widened just slightly, before she nodded, biting her lip,

“Okay.”

He picked up her bag and helped her out the door, waiting for her as she locked the apartment, which he hoped she wouldn’t miss too much back with the real thing.

***

It had been a while since Rose had admitted that she never slept the same without the hum of the TARDIS in the back of her mind, but she knew that night she would sleep well.

She’d visited her room only briefly, finding it just as she’d left, and she dropped off her bag before heading over to meet the Doctor in his room.

It seemed a bit sudden, and rushed, to resume their usual routine without any sort of procedure…but she knew she wanted to.

The Doctor had already lathered up his face, and buzzed his hair short before she got there.

“You started without me.”

She pouted only to get a reaction, and he was perfect, he winked at her and shrugged,

“You humans are just so easily distracted.”

His arms were mostly bare, for he’d pushed up the sleeves of his jumper, black that day, and his jacket was lying discarded over on the edge of the bathtub.

He held out the razor to her, and she hoped her hands weren’t shaking.

It had been a long time.

She was careful, with slow upstrokes and gentle flips and wiping of the razor on the towel covering his shoulder.

She knew if she nicked him he could easily sonic himself, he’d once joked it was one of the best things about being the Doctor. Immune to most cuts and bruises.

When he’d said that, she’d only wanted to test it out, by kissing him, and his collarbone and his neck and forcing him to admit defeat.

She shook herself.

That had been before they’d met Jack. Then everything had changed.

She’d still known how much she liked him, needed him, wanted him, but he’d become so hard to read.

Not that he hadn’t always been.

After a few more minutes she was done, and she took the towel, turned it over, and wiped off his face.

“How do you feel?”

The Doctor didn’t look into the mirror once; he was still staring at her. he’d watched her steadily as she worked, and though it had made her nervous, it had also somehow helped her focus.

She noticed her hands were shaking, and she looked away from him.

“Like a new man. Of course, I don’t think the shave and haircut were all that did that.”

Rose could hardly believe it…was he saying?

“What do you mean?”

His hand snagged hers, and she dropped the towel, fighting the urge to run.

He could surely feel her ragged heartbeat now, and without time lord senses, he’d smell her growing desire.

When Jack first told her that time lords were sensitive to more than just the normal five senses, and slightly psychic even when not in contact with people, Rose had been scared to death.

Once returned to the TARDIS from many an adventure she’d been on an adrenaline high, and most certainly been fractions of a second from jumping into the Doctor’s arms, happy for a hug, but certainly open to more.

How long had he known?

And never said?

Rose knew she had to be bright red in that moment, and the Doctor was about to tease her about it any moment.

“I’m so glad to have you with me. I really couldn’t do it without you. I didn’t go anywhere while you were home. I was just on one planet, helping as much as I could. Lost on the edge of the galaxy, I wondered what you were doing. I wondered if you missed me. I never got a call, so I was afraid you didn’t…”

Rose gasped.

A second later the Doctor had tugged on her hand, and closed the distance between them. Without a single fumble or question, his free hand had cupped her cheek, and his lips were pressed to hers gently.

He didn’t push her, didn’t probe her lips with his tongue, he just kept them together, sharing one breath and one rare triple heartbeat.

The swarm of butterflies that had returned to life upon sight of the Doctor now rose into a dance, and there just wasn’t enough air in the room.

Rose moved back, but put her hands to his shoulders to steady herself.

Lightheaded was a mild way to put how she felt.

The Doctor breathed out a slow breath, and she felt his muscles flex beneath her fingers.

“Are you okay?”

Rose nodded. She didn’t quite trust herself to speak yet.

The Doctor looked ready to be the one to fill the silence, but then a knock rang out.

It was on the front doors.

There was no way they would have heard it if the TARDIS hadn’t wanted them too.

Rose sighed.

“I guess we better let him in yeah?”

The Doctor frowned,

“Do we have to?”

Rose managed a nervous giggle,

“Yes. He’s just as excited to see you as I was…well…maybe without the mindless talking.”

The Doctor shook his head,

“I liked being caught up on things in your life. Don’t ever call it that again.”

“Let’s go let him in then yeah?”

The Doctor nodded reluctantly, getting back to his feet slowly.

The stool he’d been leaning on while Rose shaved him wasn’t very low, but it had made their height equal.

Now Rose realized he’d need to lean down to kiss her…if it happened again.

“Good thing he didn’t see me with that beard. I’d have never heard the end of how sexy I looked as a homeless guy.”

Rose bit her lip to keep from laughing, but she nodded.

The console room seemed to be infinitely brighter, and as the Doctor went to let Jack inside, Rose stepped up close to the console itself, and whispered a hello.

Maybe she imagined it, but she could have sworn she felt a hello in reply somewhere inside her mind.

She was finally home, and things were finally on their way to improving.

Jack’s excited voice filled her ears and she turned to him with a grin, she knew she’d have to fill him in later. But for now, she was prepared to enjoy the next adventure the Doctor took them on.

Their next stop was anywhere.

***

**END**

**Author's Note:**

> this was inspired by a graphic i made a long time ago, along with a short prompt, but as no one ever picked it up, i decided i'd do it myself.  
> find the original here:  
> http://timeladyspacepirateutteroutcast.tumblr.com/post/75860921516/au-from-boom-town


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